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I realize it's been well over two months since I last posted. The last month has been crazy. We left May 8th and drove to Idaho for my brother's college graduation, stayed there for 5 days and then drove down to Farmington, New Mexico with Caity and stayed with our "cousins" for two and a half weeks. We helped with the last preparations for our dear friends wedding last weekend and came home tired and happy Sunday evening. It was a truly wonderful trip, but after a month, I am glad to be back home with no up coming trips for the next few weeks. I haven't left the house yet. It's been awesome!

It was such a blessing to spend two weeks with our dear friends. We decorated Meg's house, ran errands, made food, watched movies, played frisbee, went on walks, talked for hours, altered dresses, made cake pops, decorations, programs, rosettes, curtains, towels, bouquets, boutonnières, and a dress, and fellowshipped with friends. It was fantastic and the wedding came together very smoothly. Saturday morning was a little hectic with running to Hobby Lobby and back and then taking stuff to the reception hall and back and then picking up stuff from the reception hall and back, all before the bride returned from her hair and makeup appointment. Pictures were taken, the flowers didn't wilt, the bride was stunning, the groom couldn't stop smiling, some of the attendants cried, the maid of honor made it through her speech (but not without tears), and we partied it up at the reception.

Sunday we worshipped with the saints at the Skeen's church and then enjoyed a wonderful afternoon of fellowship at a park before heading home. I'm eager to see all the dear people at our church back home though.
So there's a general update and hopefully I'll be able to keep up posting with more regularity in the near future.

Of Blossoming Trees and Falling Snow

The weather was beautiful all of last week; in the 70's most days with beautiful sunshine and hardly any wind. Our fruit trees have begun to blossom and the grass is greening up and growing. 

Just in time for snow today and a possible freeze tonight. 

He Sustained Me

During the drive to Church this morning I opened my Bible to the book of Psalms. As I read, there was a short, simple verse that brought to mind how amazing God's love and care for us is and how amazing is His design of our bodies.   

"I lay down and slept; 

I awoke, for the Lord sustained me." 

Psalm 2:5

God designed our bodies to need sleep, for which I think we are all grateful. Knowing that we can lay down for eight hours (give or take) and do nothing is such a pleasant thing. How sweet and and simple. Yet while we are doing nothing, He keeps our hearts beating and out lungs breathing. We don't have to tell them to keep functioning, God does that for us all the time. He designed our bodies that way. He sustains our life while we sleep. It is by His grace and by His hand that we wake up each morning and live to see another day. 

"I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made, 

marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well."

Psalm 139:14

Add to Your Faith

"But also for this very reason, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue, to virtue knowledge, to knowledge self-control, to self-control perseverance, to perseverance godliness, to godliness brotherly kindness, and to brotherly kindness love. For if these things are yours and abound, you will be neither barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.

For he who lacks these things is shortsighted, even to blindness, and has forgotten that he was cleansed from his old sins. Therefore, brethren, be even more diligent to make your call and election sure, for if you do these things you will never stumble; for so an entrance will be supplied to you abundantly into the everlasting kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ."

Input

Dear Blog Readers,

It's officially spring!!!! And has been for the past 8 days (I'm just a little behind). But I did finally change my back ground to something a little more happy and springish rather than the snowy, make-you-want-to-cuddle-on-the-couch-with-a-book-and-blanket background that I had before. =) But I know that sometimes it can be hard to read due to bad color combinations, or just not enjoyable to read especially if there are lots of bright colors (which I love). So, I'd love your input on the new background. If it's too hard on the eyes - PLEASE tell me. I want you to enjoy reading my blog. Have a beautiful day!

-Marissa

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"Look after the purity of your heart and the purity of your life will follow." - Pastor Brainerd

For a good man out of the treasures of his heart brings forth good; and an evil man out of the treasure of his heart brings forth evil. For out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks. Luke 6:45

Coffee Shop Critique

I sit in the comfy arm chair directly across the pick-up counter, head phones playing soft classical music in my ears, my book open on my lap, and a hot Cinnamon Dulce Latte warming my chilled hands. From my position, where I try not to get too comfy as the warm spring sun streams through the window and warms my face, I have a great view of the entire coffee shop except for two small tables in the back corner. The door opens, I look up, two co-workers in suits and ties walk up to the counter and immediately place their order. They wait a brief minute, grab their cups of fresh drip coffee, dress it up in their own way, and walk out; this must be a frequent routine. My eyes slowly travel around the room; every minute the crowd changes as people stop in for their morning stimulant before heading to another day of work. Tall and short, fair and dark, athletic and over weight, hipster or businessman, assorted nationalities; take your pick. Each customer is so diverse, so different and yet that is exactly what makes it a typical coffee shop.

Some read newspapers, another flips through a magazine. Apple computers, iPads, and smart phones are the most common companion for most people, but there is the occasional person who brought along a real human with whom to share their coffee and thoughts. A young woman, athletic in build as well as style, occasionally lifts her focused eyes from her computer to glance at passers by. Something she reads disturbs her, her brow furrows, she looks worried, a hand, previously resting on her temples, covers her mouth - shock or grief? - I can't quite read the expression. A minute later the hand becomes a barrier on one side of her face between the world of the coffee shop and her eyes. She looks about to cry. I'll never know what she read, but I hope everything's ok. Later I catch her eye and offer her a smile and receive one in return.

This early spring weather in New Mexico has everyone confused as to proper attire - pants and boots, capris and flip flops, sweat shirts, scarves, and faux fur. One day it's freezing and windy and the next it's a sunny 65. I think about all these people and their mysterious lives. All I can see is the external side, which says a lot, yet I know nothing about who they really are. Each man and woman has their own unique story, their own thoughts, their own troubles. I wonder what it's like to be a midget? I smile on the inside, but I feel sorry for him at the same time, and I try not to stare. I stop and realize now, that with each person I've seen come and go, I've passed a judgement - not necessarily bad or harsh, critical or unkind - but a judgement none-the-less. I've decided in my mind, based on appearances, what I think they are like. I am disturbed at how quick and easy it is to label someone based on externals.

I mull over this for quite a while as I go about my errands, my drive home, and my chores around the house. After lunch, I sit down to have my quiet time. I flip open to where my bookmark lay between the pages of my Bible and begin to read. James 1 - a personal favorite. I think about things our pastor has brought up in discussion about this in our Bible study. James 2 - I've read it many times, but this time the verses jump out at me and I smile at God's perfect timing.

"My brethren, do not hold the faith of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Lord of glory, with partiality. For if there should come into your assembly a man with gold rings, in fine apparel, and there should also come in a poor man in filthy clothes, and you pay attention to the one wearing the fine clothes and say to him, 'you sit here in a good place,' and say to the poor man, 'you stand there,' or, 'sit here are my footstool,' have you not shown partiality among yourselves, and become judges with evil thoughts? Listen, my beloved brethren: has God not chosen the poor of this world to be rich in faith and heirs of the kingdom which He promised to those who love Him?... Do they not blaspheme that noble name by which you are called?" (vs. 1-7)

As humans and sinners, it is our tendency to judge others based on our circumstances and our personal experiences. God has created and called each and every person for a different purpose, to experience different things, to have different circumstances for a reason. We don't have to know or understand. We don't have to agree with someone else's choices, but we are told to show Christ's love and to let Him be the judge.



* photo from All Best Wallpapers 

What Drives Your Day?

A dull moment comes, the computer is before me, my hand stretches out to open the internet browser. "Stop! Don't do it. You said you weren't going to! There's nothing that important that happens on facebook anyway." My hand pulls back and I pick up the phone to make a few phone calls awaiting my attention.

I've decided to take a vacation. A vacation from media that is. I've been doing a lot of thinking lately about several different things that I need to work on in my life. Things that will require concerted effort, daily intentionality, and constant attention. In the past as I think about areas of weakness it is all too easy to say I need to work on that and then move on with life without a change. I don't want to keep doing that. That in and of itself is a weakness. 

Making changes in your life takes intentionality. Patience doesn't come by saying "I need to be more patient" (don't we wish). It doesn't even come just by praying. God doesn't just drop a truck load of patience into our laps. He give us more and more opportunities to practice patience and develop the character. If I want to learn to be a better friend, use my time wisely, serve more faithfully, or help more cheerfully I have to make a deliberate effort to change my current course. It doesn't happen over night. 

For me, facebook, movies, and sometimes music, are the main things that distract me from what I should be doing, create/feed sinful desires, and often take the place of spending time with God. A red flag went up for me when I realized that my first priority of the day was checking fb. First thing out of bed- computer on, facebook open. Did anything happen since I last checked it right before I went to sleep? You know there's something wrong when you are more eager to check facebook 20 times a day than you are to spend time with in God's word even once. What are your priorities? What is your focus? Are you serving God or the idols you have created? What have you let become the most important things in your life? These are all questions that I have been thinking about for a while - ever since I read Idols of the Heart by Elyse Fitzpatrick. Also our pastor has talked about idols quite a bit the last few Sundays as ties into our study of Isaiah. I want my day to start and end in time with God, not with my cyber friends. I want the God to be the rudder that steers my day. I want to long for God, not my computer. It is so easy to let little things get in the way of what really matters and so hard to break down the idols we create. 

Deuteronomy 6:5 

"You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your mind, and with all your strength." 

John 15:13

"Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one's life for his friends." 

These two verses have been coming to mind a lot. I want these verses to characterize my life and to make that happen it's going to take concentrated effort and focus. 

When Restless Legs Don't Sleep

It's a gentle rock, a smooth motion - except for the occasional jerk and jolt - like the rocking of a mother with her child, like the sway of a cradle, like the roll of the ocean waves. It is a new experience, this travel by train. From one side of the country to the other. Chicago to Albuquerque. Twenty-five hours of continual, smooth motion. The clock ticks on. The hours grow late, then early. Nights are short when sleep comes easily, and yet they drag on, each moment seeming an eternity, when no sleep comes. My body, fighting illness for the third time in a month, begs for sleep, but my restless legs have a different idea in mind. My eyes long to rest during these early hours as they are accustom to do at this time of night, but my aching back doesn't agree. I take my book to the lounge car so I can read without disturbing the peaceful, sleeping passengers with the light. Quite a contrast now from the boisterous group of adolescents  that flooded the seats before. A few like minded souls scatter the seats; one reading, two talking, another on the phone - the remains of a midnight snack littering the table before him.

I think over the past 5 days. Packing, flying, driving, sitting, talking, laughing. Meeting new people, seeing old friends and acquaintances, listening to hours of lectures, great cafeteria food, fellowship. It all sped by so fast. It jumbles in my head begging to be sorted and processed. Courage, faith, leadership, fathers, vision, discipleship, hospitality, work, rest, play, and taking dominion. What else is there to do at this time of night?

The Soul Who Sins Shall Die

"It is sin that is the cause of our damning in hell fire. The soul who sins - that soul shall die. The soul sins against God when it receives sin in the heart to entertain it there. It has chosen sin rather than God. At God's command the soul refuses to let sin go. Consider seven efforts of the sinner to hold on to sin. 

(1) If possible, the soul that entertains sin will hide it that it will not be discovered. 

(2) The soul that cannot hide its sin will excuse it and plead that it is not such a bad thing: 'Why make such a fuss about it?' 

(3) The soul that justifies its sin will seek to cover it with a good name: Note - Isaiah 5:20. *

(4) If his convictions cannot deny that it is sin and that God is offended by it, then that soul might give flattering promises to God that it will put the sin away before too very long, but actually maybe not at all. It is clear that this soul delights in its abominations. 

(5) If God yet pursues, and seeks to see if he has indeed put this sin away, this soul might put away the worst part, and keep the finest. It might put away the part that can best be spared, and keep the most profitable for help in a pinch. 

(6) Yes, if all sin must be abandoned or the soul will have not rest, why then, the soul that is entertaining it might let it part, but it will part with a sad heart since it hates to let it go. 

(7) If at any time they con, or shall meet with each other again, and nobody will be the wiser, O what a courting will be between sin and the soul! This is called doing things in the dark. 

By these things you might see that sin has a friend in the soul. This is a strong argument that God, His Word, His ways, and His graces are out of favor with your soul, and that sin and Satan are its only true pleasant companions."

-John Bunyan (Voices from the Past)

* "Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil; who put darkness for light, and light for darkness; who put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!" Is. 5:20

What does it mean to truly repent of our sins? To fully let go. To turn from our sin and put it to death. Sin that is put to death will never be present in our lives again. How often do we make exceptions or excuses for the sin in our lives just as Bunyan said. We try to hide it, justify it, or only let part of it go. True repentance means completely shunning the sin in our life - hating it - turning away from Satan's temptations and seeking God in stead. Running away from death and embracing Life. 

It is not just the 'big' sins we must flea from, but from ALL sin. Even the seemingly insignificant or 'little' sins. Sin is sin.

The truth is we often love our sin and we have become comfortable with it. We don't want to part from it because it brings us gratification and pleasure. The pleasure is, however, only temporary. Sin does not produce the real joy or pleasure that comes from God. The end result is death, condemnation, and hell. It is so easy to try and justify our sin, and sometimes it's easy to hide it from others, but it is never hidden from God. He knows the heart and is not fooled by a false front. 

Singles Awareness Day? Or Another Day to be Thankful?

Everyone knows what February 14th is almost as soon as they know their own birthday. 

It's Valentine's Day.  

It's the day when guys give their sweethearts flowers, boxes of chocolate, chocolate covered strawberries (the best choice in my opinion), fluffy, stuffed bears holding red hearts that read "be mine" or "I love you". 

It's got to be one of the restaurants' favorite days of the year. 

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 but for some of us, there is no "special one" yet 

some like to call it "Singles Awareness Day"

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In a sense, it's true, you are aware, perhaps more so than normal, that you are single. 

Is this reason to be depressed or have self-pity, mope around, or harbor jealousy for your friends who have been blessed with a relationship? 

Absolutely NOT! 

You are no less loved than they are just because you aren't married/dating/courting or haven't met the ONE. 

Today I've seen Facebook status after Facebook status about Valentine's Day or someone's special person. 

And each one makes me smile. 

I thought about three different friends who got engaged a year ago this week. 

They're all married now and I have even more friends to add to the courting/engaged/married list than I did last year. 

I am thrilled for them. 

God has given them an incredible blessing. 

A blessing most of us, Lord willing, will receive in God's perfect timing. 

But in all honesty it's not about US. It's not about the singles out there.

Let the couples enjoy the day. 

You can't do anything to change the fact that you're single. But instead of feeling sorry for yourself, I've got some ideas. 

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Pray for your future spouse 

(p.s. they're single this year too!)  :-0

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Think of ways you can show your love and gratitude to your family members.

Yes, even those little brothers who want to tackle you with a football style hug. That's their way of showing love.

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Rejoice with your friends who are celebrating Valentines for the first time.

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Most importantly, focus on the greatest gift of LOVE that was ever given.

The gift of Salvation. 

"Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one's life for his friends." (John 15:13)

God sent His only Son to lay down His life for YOU. 

Greater Love has no one than THIS.

Me - a College Student????!!!!

(no, the picture has nothing to do with the post)

As most of you know I have decided to apply for college. Since my graduation last May, I have been at home helping my mom run the house in various ways, being a mother's helper to a few families we know, pursuing music and photography, sewing and reading. I have learned a lot in the past 9 months and I have been challenged in many ways. I am so thankful for the opportunity to stay at home and serve my family. When I decided last year not to apply for college, and knowing, or thinking that I knew, neither of my siblings would not be at college this next year, I thought last year would be my only opportunity to go so I figured that it just wasn't part of God's plan for me.

However just in the last few weeks things have changed. My sister has decided to stay up in Idaho for her junior year and continue taking classes. When she mentioned the possibility of staying, it got me thinking. Maybe this was my opportunity? Is this really what God wanted me to do? I spent many hours praying, talking to my parents, and thinking. Soon I felt very sure that this was the course God was leading to. I leave it in God's hands whether or not I am accepted.


There are several reasons that I want to go and for those of you who are interested in those reasons, stick around and I'll tell you. =)

-First of all my sister will be there which makes a huge difference. I don't think I would want to go without her or my brother. There is just something about having someone you know and love, who knows you so well, and who you trust to be there for you. Not to mention the fact that she's my best friend. =)

-I want to continue my education and be preparing myself to be the best wife, mother, and teacher I can be for my future family. I want to be well rounded and become a better conversationalist, be able to engage in all types of conversations about theology, politics, current events, books, and life in general. I have so much to learn in this area and I feel that the classes I can take at college will be a huge foundation and launching pad. Also, I am committed to home schooling my kids someday and to give them the best education possible, I need to be as well educated as I can be. In these single years God gives me, I want to use my time wisely and be a faithful servant. Ephesians 5: 15-17 says, "see then that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be unwise, but understand what the will of the Lord is."

-College will be the hardest thing I've ever had to do. It will push me out of my comfort zone, it will challenge me spiritually, mentally, physically, and emotionally, but "we glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope." (Rom 5:3) I want to be challenged. I want to be tested and push myself beyond what I think I can do.

-Over the last 4 years that my brother has been in Idaho at this college I have been there 4 times and have gotten to see the community, not to mention what I've heard and seen from my siblings lives up there. The small town is home to two solid churches, ample opportunities to serve, and great accountability.

-The college (New Saint Andrews in Moscow, Idaho) is a very small school with only about 200 students total which means classes are very small.
-The faculty really invests in the students and gets to know them on a personal level.
-It is a Christian college that focuses on liberal arts and culture (that is the only degree they offer). I would be taking Lordship (theology), music (which includes both music theory and concert choir), and rhetoric.
-There are no dorms so the students either live in apartments or with families around town (which is what I would be doing).

What is the Real Problem - the World or the Family?

Just in the last month or so I've given a great deal of thought to family and what a family should look like. I know there is no such thing as a perfect family, flawless parents, or angelic children, but as I look around me in different circles, whether at the "world" or in the realm of Christian families, I have been so disappointed and saddened by what I see. I see children who disrespect their parents, parents who don't see children as a blessing from the Lord, fathers who forsake their duty to shepherd and lead their wives and children, mothers who don't value time with their little ones, and kids that don't know how to interact in an adult world or with anyone outside of their peer group. Though it is disappointing to see any dysfunctional family, it grieves my heart to see Christian families nation wide falling apart. As Christians we are called to be different, set apart, and bear the resemblance of Christ. Parents are commanded to "train up [their] children in the way [they] should go and when [they] are old [they] will not depart from it" (Prov 22:6). Clearly this is not happening in our culture. Setting rules and standards, teaching kids about God, scripture, responsibility, honesty, relationships, roles as men and women, respect, etc. is so far from most parents' minds it is no wonder we find ourselves in a rebellious, dishonest, and self-centered culture.

Many of you have probably seen the movie Courageous that came out October 2011. The message was to call out fathers to be courageous, protect their children, take a stand in their families, teach their children to love the Lord with all their heart, mind, soul, and strength, lead, and fight for their families. It is so important that fathers take their roles seriously. I know it is a hard job, no one said it would be easy, life as a Christian isn't supposed to be easy. It is a father's duty and responsibility to lead his family biblically. He is accountable to God for the way he led or didn't. And again, I know that there are no perfect fathers out there, but I see a lot of fathers who aren't even trying. Now, I don't want anyone to think that mothers don't have a role to play as well, because they certainly do! Mom's are extremely influential in their children's lives. I know. I have a mom. =) But dads are the ones who are commanded to lead their children and their wives, so the wives should be following in the husbands footsteps and carrying out his mission when he is not at home. When men fulfill their role as father and husband, leader, protector, provider, and shepherd, there is a great likelihood that we will see a revival in younger generations.

I cannot express how exceedingly grateful I am for my parents. They are so amazing and wonderful and I pray that someday my marriage will be as strong as theirs and that I will follow in their footsteps. My siblings and I have been blessed beyond what we deserve.
My father is a man of integrity who strives to lead his family according to scripture, who makes wise decisions, provides all we need and abundantly more, selflessly gives of himself for his family, loves his wife unconditionally, faithfully works hard both at his job and at home, and most importantly loves the Lord with all his heart.
My mom is the most amazing woman I know and I owe most of who I am to her, her love, faithfulness, and determination. She is passionate about things that matter, she always made it clear that she loved to have us around, she brought us along side her and taught us to love God, she spent hours upon hours teaching us at home, not to mention how much of her limited free time she spent researching curriculums and planning out a purposeful course of education. Mom has never stopped encouraging us to seek God's purpose for our lives, to live for His glory in all that we do, to put the interests of others above our own, to serve with a cheerful and grateful heart, to do anything we do with excellence, and to find our interests and pursue them with passion as unto the Lord. She is not one to make a rash decision or agree to something without learning all she can, talking through the pros and cons, and prayerfully seeking God's direction.
I think one of the best things my parents did for us was to teach us what was right and why. They consistently gave us biblical reasons for their decisions and now looking back at times when I didn't understand, I can see how wise they were and I am so thankful God gave them discernment. When people saw that my mother enjoyed her "cute little kids" some would say, "just wait till they're all teenagers!" My parents decided then an there that their kids were not going to be like other 'teenagers' of our culture and I cannot thank them enough for the commitment.

Family is so important. It is the family that makes or breaks the culture. If things are not right in the family, there's no way things are going to be right out in the world. It all starts at home.

Carpe Diem

Well hello there! Glad to see some of you haven't completely given up on me, even though I have been terribly unfaithful in my posting! Life has been crazy the last couple weeks. I feel like I'm still trying to get on top of the new year and show it who's boss. =)

I spent this last week in Santa Fe at our capitol staffing the New Mexico TeenPact class. It was a fantastic experience for me and God taught me so much. We had an amazing staff team with Bill Jack as our guest speaker/director for the week, it was a privilege to work with him. Something that really impacted me and challenged my perspective on the way I view each day was something that our program director told us and that was "you can never live today again." Of course we all know that we never get to relive the same day twice, but do we really stop to realize that we never get to relieve the same day twice? Every moment is here and gone like a wave upon the sand.
We can never take back the words we say or the tone of our voice, we can never change what has happened or what we've done, BUT we can change what we do in the future. We can determine to live intentionally and make every day count. We can determine to use our words to give life to others instead of giving words of death. We can choose to encourage rather than discourage. We can look for the positive and not focus on the negative.

We can live a life that will impact those around us for Christ's Kingdom spreading His light and love, or we can live each day for ourselves ignoring the purpose for which we were created - to glorify God and enjoy Him forever.

Carpe Diem - seize the day my friends! Let us take captive every day that we are given and not waste it on ourselves and the pleasures of this fleeting life. Let us focus, not on the things of this world that are temporary, but on the things of God which are eternal. 

What are ways we can be intentional in the way we live each day? What are things we can be doing in our everyday lives and in our homes that keep the focus on our eternal purpose?

Finding the Will of God

In his book Finding the Will of God, Bruce K. Waltke challenges his readers to rethink the concept of "seeking God's will for your life." For many people it is normal to talk about "finding God's will for their lives" as if God held some hidden secret about your life. It's not like that, but neither does God send down a letter with an outline for the next 10 years of your life.
It would be so nice if God would just reveal His plan for our lives so we'll know what's next. Right? Well, in some ways He does. We have been given the Bible which is a Christian's guide for life. All scripture is given to us for "doctrine, reproof, correction, and instruction in righteousness" (2 Timothy 3:16). We have been given the incredible gift of the Holy Spirit and the ability to talk to our Heavenly Father who hears and answers our prayers.
In his book, Waltke emphasizes the importance of our relationship with God. "Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart" (Psalm 37:4) As we spend time in the Word, seek the Lord in prayer, meditate on scripture, and live according to His commands, God will draw our hearts closer to His and our desires will be more like His.
Our personal relationship with God shouldn't be something on our to-do-list each day, ready to be checked off, it should be a part of the way we live.

"As you develop a heart for God, you find that your desires change and become consonant with the heart of God."

"Instead of asking God to 'reveal His will' we should be asking Him to develop His character of wisdom in us."

"When you really love God and your neighbor, you can be very comfortable following your desires because they are not self-ambitious and self-centered."

"The person who truly knows the Lord develops a love for Him and a closeness to Him, so that He begins to shape one's Character and values. Soon He is filling up your thoughts with His thoughts, so that you have the mind of Christ and live according to Him. When you love God you live in His will."

"God's will is that you be holy, wise, mature, joyful, prayerful, and submissive."

P.S. I highly recommend the book.