You Can Only Withdraw if There's Been a Deposit

This weekend we were blessed to have some very dear friends come visit. In one of our many discussions my dear friend and I were talking about kids, respect, and obedience. She shared with me an analogy that she has heard recently that I found very helpful and encouraging. 

Humans, especially when they are babies and young children, were created to need love and affection. If a child had grown up in a loving home, their love tank is probably full. Children who have not had that upbringing, are more likely to have a very low or empty tank. With love comes respect, a kid that is surrounded by love respects his parents and wants to please them. When a parent asks something of a child they are making a withdraw, so to speak, from their tank. If the tank is dry, a withdraw will only lead to a messy frustration, but when you have made lots of deposits into the tank and it is full to overflowing, you can be confident that writing a check is safe. Of course you have to continue to refill the tank or even the fullest tank will soon be empty. 

For me this doesn't apply to my own children yet, because well...frankly I don't have any. =)  But it does however apply to my siblings. Having 7 and 9 year gaps between me and my younger siblings, I have authority in their lives, but I can't keep writing checks without making deposits into the account. If I want love, respect, and obedience in return, I have to make deposits first.